Rece Davis: Hi Everyone and welcome to The Carrier Dome where The Unstoppable, unbeatable, future national champion Syracuse Orange Will Be facing The Villanova Wildcats Tonight in front of a NATIONAL RECORD CROWD, man aren't these fans great (15,000 neanderthals and jews cheer in the background.)
Hubert Davis: I didn't know there was a basketball game, I just thought I was here to give Coach Boeheim head. You know, it tasted almost as good as Coach Calipari's did.
Digger Phelps: Hubert, I didn't know there was a game either, but geez I need to brush my teeth so I can get the taste of Boeheim's peter out of my mouth.
Jay Bilas: Can we talk about the game?
Rece: Um, yeah whatever. Will Villanova be able to penetrate the incredible, unstoppable, inpregnable zone defense of Villanova?
Hubert: Jim Boeheim teams are always in your face on defense, which is bizarre because he was in my face earlier.
Digger: I agree Hubert, very in your face. Which reminds me.. Andy Rautins has to be the greatest thing to happen to Canada since his father Leo.
Jay: Why don't we talk about Scottie Reynolds who should be the frontrunner for Big East Player of The Year?
Jay: Scottie Reynolds, The Villanova point guard?
Hubert: Oh, him.
Digger: Are you talking about John Wall?
Jay: NO I'm talking about Scottie Reynolds.
Jay: Scottie Reynolds.
Digger: Is this some guy I met in a rest stop bathroom?
Jay: No, he's the point guard for Villanova.
Digger: I should meet more people in rest stop bathrooms.
Rece: Oh well, who cares about somebody no one has ever heard of. Let's talk about how Syracuse is going to own Villanova tonight. Predictions?
Digger: Well, Judging by the authority that Boeheim went to my face earlier, that's the same authority Wes Johnson will be going to the hole. Syracuse by 50.
Hubert: UNC by 10
Jay: Villanova in a squeaker.