- The Virgin Mary named her baby Jesus because she couldn't spell Szczur.
- Matt Szczur once ate his entire birthday cake before his friends told him there was a stripper inside.
- Tiger's mistresses thought they were sleeping with Matt Szczur.
- Matt Szczur is wanted in Montana for genocide.
- When Matt Szczur went to Jerusalem, people tried to nail him to a cross. To their dismay, he escaped because no one Catches Matt Szczur.. Ever
- Matt Szczur once broke 20 tackles in a flag football game.
- Matt Szczur is not familiar with the letter 'K'
- Barry Bonds took steroids because he wanted to be like Matt Szczur.
- When Smokey the Bear said "Only you can prevent forest fires," he was speaking directly to Matt Szczur.
- Matt Szczur has slept with approximately 3 billion women because he never strikes out.
- Matt Szczur lost his virginity before his father.
- Satan attempted to filibuster Matt Szczur's conception.
- The original health care bill included a cap on the punishment dished out by Matt Szczur.
- Matt Szczur can win a game of Connect Four in 3 moves.
- Before Signing with Villanova, Matt Szczur was tempted in the desert for 40 days and 40 nights.
- Matt Szczur wanted to play three sports at Villanova, but they wouldn't sanction barehanded lion hunting.
- Matt Szczur's football number has a direct correlation to the number of testicles he has.
Monday, March 22, 2010
Killing Time on a Monday: Matt Szczur Facts
Jay Wright Facts, I've decided to come up with some facts about Villanova's very own demigod Matt Szczur.